The News of Today is the History of Tomorrow July 27, 2023

1)  In the biggest news of today, the judge in the Hunter Biteme case tore up his plea agreement.

-He plead “not guilty.”

2) This has serious implications, as Paul Sperry describes, most notably he is no longer guaranteed from further prosecution on charges he acted as an unregistered foreign agent, which in turn opens up the Rutabaga and his evil, corrupt, gaggledipping, analleaking spawn.

3) More from Sperry: Hunter’s legal team thought they had papered over his exposure.

4)  . . . until Federal Judge Maryellen Noreika asked if Biteme would be immune from prosecution for other crimes. When the prosecutor said no, Hunter’s attorneys then said “No deal”.

5) MORE: the amicus brief from Congress advised the court that Hunter got “preferential treatment” and the deal was “influenced by politics.” Later, on Steve Bannon’s “War Room,” Cong. Tiffany of WI said he thought the amicus brief provided the final nail in the coffin, so Congress is doing something.

6) Moreover, Judge Noreika set conditions for his release as zero drinking or drugs (yikes!—He’ll break that in 30 minutes). And he has to have a job.

-Sorry judge, he does run a laundromat.

7) Maybe all this is why Devon Archer, Hunter’s former business partner, is “in hiding” and “fears for his family’s safety” but will testify next week before Congress.

8) While the Senior Skank fled to France to get as far away from Hunter’s filth as she could.

-Only she went to a UN event, which is equally decayed.

9) Meanwhile, Yertle either had a stroke or an epileptic moment, froze, and Rutabaga-like had to be led away from the podium.

-ALL THESE OLD FARTS NEED TO GO. (Trump, on the other hand, is fit as a fiddle, and I am but a kid by Biblical standards!)

10) Jersey Shore, Chris Christie, made clear he isn’t a serious candidate and is in it for the PAC money and perks, saying he doesn’t even have an operation in Iowa.

-These liars are all a bunch of grifters. They need to attend the Clinton College of High-Class Grifting and learn how it’s really done.

11) More and more stories like this: “DemoKKKrats’ dilemma: how to convince Rutabaga to drop out of the race.”

-They can’t, and they won’t. He will be the nominee and try to cheat his way to victory a second time.

12) Hoax News Media and Congress simpletons beginning to panic about the Rutabaga’s deep crime connections.

13) Under duress, the FascistBI has handed over docs about the targeting of Catholics

-You know, those people who keep voting DemoKKKrat?

14) All the screeching about “how hot it is” is a hoax. Even the EPA admits heatwaves have drastically declined since the 1930s.

15) GOP phlegmjackets still haven’t learned to fight fire with fire: “Skeptical GOP senators warn against impeachment cheapening the process.”

-The old “take the high road to a loss” strategy.

16) Ron DeSantis has had to scrap two fundraisers in the Hamptons due to lack of interest, having previously cut in half the amount requested. (“This weekend broke the DeSantis campaign,” said one fundraiser). But RFK, Jr. racked up the big bucks.

17) Vivek Ramaswamy has unveiled plans to eradicate the FascistBI, DoEd, and nuclear regulatory commission. I like it.

18) But, I should add, Vivek, for the first time, is starting to get evangelical pushback on his Hinduism from Pastor and prophet Hank Kunneman.

-I knew this was coming. Surprised it took this long.

19) Five blue states have sent their highest earners to Florida to escape taxes.

20) A family died in the Rockies after trying to “live off the grid.”

-Mess with the bull, ya get the horns. Me? “Camping” is a suite at Marriott.

21) The New Mexico governor’s hotline was caught referring women to a satanic temple for abortions.

-Well, it is the appropriate place, right?

22) Speaking of satanic groups, Faux News has reportedly scrubbed its website of a satanic group that gave “charitable donations” after an investigative report.

23) Kollyfornia’s opioid deaths increased by 121% in three years.

IN CULTURE NEWS

24) A Seattle writer was fired after criticizing Lenin.

-Why in the world would Seattle have a statue of one of the worst mass murderers in history in its public square?

IN ECONOMIC NEWS

25) Prices of new homes have dropped below the prices of used houses for the first time since 2005 with high inventories.

26) The Fed hiked rates to 5.50%.

IN INTERNATIONAL NEWS

27) Coup-prone Niger has sealed off the administrative offices; apparently, out of concern, another coup is brewing.

28) There is a race to salvage a sinking cargo ship carrying 3,000 vehicles, including 350 Mercedes, as the ship burns out of control in the North Sea . . . the fire started by an electric car.

29) Latin America has isolated the EU, and the Ukes’ grain revenue is gone.

30) One of the ISIS “Beatles,” rapper Abdel-Majed Abdel Bary found dead in his Spanish prison cell. What’s the Spanish phrase for “he was Epsteined?”

31) Peru declared a national health emergency over mass Guillain-Barre Syndrome thought to be caused by contaminated water.

-Course, there is the vax. How vaxxed were you, Peru?

32) New evidence shows the universe might not be expanding.

33) In Congressional testimony, a witness states that non-human biological pilot material was recovered from crashed crafts.

34) Actor Kevin Spacey was acquitted in a UK court of sexually assaulting four men.

35) Sinead O’Connor dead—the Irish music legend died at age 56 after years of mental health battles.

IN CHINA VIRUS NEWS

36) More myocardial problems with the Moderna Vax.

AND FINALLY...

37) And finally, Britney Spears removed nasty content about her mother and sister from her tell-all book after they reconciled.

-I don’t get why she still won’t cop to our secret marriage, but, you know, I’m sure it will come out sometime.

AND THAT'S TODAY'S NEWS