The News of Today is the History of Tomorrow
IN POLITICAL NEWS
1) The Rutabaga stunned the vaxiopaths Tuesday by saying there was “no federal solution” to topping the spread of the China Virus. Now the White House is trying to walk that back by listing all the federal resources available to states.
-Sorry, ya Demented Pervert. Ya said what you meant and everyone now knows it.
2) Pollster John Zogby says Rs favored in midterms supported by heavy swing of independents (45%-27% R/D)
3) The great coach of the Oakland Raiders and the even greater broadcaster John Madden died “unexpectedly” at age 85.
RIP John Madden
What a tremendous loss pic.twitter.com/85RzRAtAXT
— Cameron Gray (@Cameron_Gray) December 29, 2021
4) Longtime DemoKKKrat operative Senator Harry Reid has died.
5) Richard Marcinko, Seal Team Six member and author, has died at 81.
6) Justice Brett Kavanaugh told the Biteme administration it has until tomorrow to file a response to the applications by faith groups, companies, and attorneys general from over half the states in the country to the vax mandate.
7) ICE denies it has organized flights of illegals to Wilkes-Barre/Scranton on December 11, 17, and 25.
-Spokeswoman Mary Houtmann said it wasn’t her agency. Nooooooo. It was probably the Department of Health and Human Services Office of Refugee Resettlement. See? That makes it better.
8) Well, well. The Biteme administration convinced the Patriot Day (January 6) committee to back down on its request for some Trump documents.
-“These aren’t the droids you’re looking for.”
9) An alternative strategy has emerged for treating Alzheimer’s Disease by boosting levels of the neurotransmitter norepinephrine.
-But only if you’re quadruple vaxxed.
10) The incoming NYC comptroller Brad Lander has requested an NYPD security detail despite calling for $1 billion in police budget cuts.
IN INTERNATIONAL NEWS
11) The Assad regime says that Iranian weapons that the Israeli Defense Force blew up were “milk.” Last time it was “coffee.”
השופרות של משטר אסד כבר מהדהדים ברשתות החברתיות שהמכולות הכילו אבקת חלב, מכלים קטנים של שמן מנועים, סלילי דבק, "חומרים לצורכי שירות" וצמיגי מכוניות. בפעם הקודמת זה היה נס קפה
— roi kais • روعي كايس • רועי קייס (@kaisos1987) December 28, 2021
12) The Chicoms fired up a giant coal power plant in the face of whines for cuts in coal power.
-(Allegedly asked for a comment, dictator Xi allegedly said, “Yankee dog! We do not need your advice.” At least, according to one trustworthy Hoax News source.)
13) And while we’re on “alleging,” an alleged MSNBC producer raises eyebrows by referring to China’s alleged human rights abuses.”
-If you don’t know, allegedly MSNBC is some sort of “news” cable network.
14) The ChiComs paraded lockdown violators through the streets with placards having their names on them.
-The article did not say where they were “paraded” to.
15) And in more ChiCom news, the Chinese government has hoarded over half the world’s grains in the last two years to prepare for “famine.”
16) Will lithium become the next “oil,” and Chile become the next “OPEC?”
IN EXTRATERRESTRIAL NEWS
17) The former head of the Harvard Astronomy Department says we need scientific analysis of satellite data on UFOs.
IN CHINA VIRUS NEWS
18) The CDC gets it seriously wrong—again—saying now that the OhMyGod variant is only responsible for 23% of new China Virus cases, not 73%.
-Small rounding error.
19) Texas becomes the seventh state to refuse to mandate China Virus vax enforcement for the National Guard.
20) The UK says 60% of the OhMyGod hospitalizations are vaxxed.
21) The OhMyGod variant could displace the Delta and signal the end of the pandemic.
22) . . . as a UK professor says that the China Virus will become just “another cause of the common cold.”
23) The Orland Park board says the Cook County suburb will not enforce the county’s “proof of vax” mandate.
-Little steps of resistance is all it takes.
24) City of Boston workers organizing against the China Virus vax. “Tyranny is here on our doorstep” (deadline Jan. 15).
IN ENTERTAINMENT NEWS
25) The Netflix series “Cheer” will return after one of the stars, Jerry Harris, was arrested in 2020 on a charge of producing child porn.
26) And finally, a grandfather aged 88 graduated from the University of Texas, San Antonio alongside his 23-year-old granddaughter.
And that’s Today’s News