The News of Today is the History of Tomorrow
IN POLITICAL NEWS
1) A U.S. appeals court for the D.C. Circuit ruled in favor of Buzzfeed that the Department of Injustice must release pages of the Mueller report that discussed individuals investigated by Mueller but not charged.
-Libs hoping one of those is Donald Trump, Jr., but watch out for what you wish for. There could be a number of names that they would regret exposing here.
2) The trial of Ghislaine Maxwell opens with the words, “She knew exactly what she was doing,” and prosecutors claim she was participating in sex trafficking.
3) . . . while conservatives fret that the Deep State has already rigged the case.
4) Meanwhile the FAA in a massive mistake accidentally exposes 704 of the previously unknown Epstein flights.
5) CNN, ABC, and more than a dozen media companies join Steve Bannon’s suit to lift the DOJ’s order stopping him from sharing 1,000 files in his contempt of Congress case.
-PS: no one can be in contempt of an institution like Congress. It’s beneath contempt.
6) Michigan school shooter killed three. Suspect in custody, but identity not revealed. Authorities were alerted to threats of the shooting on social media.
7) In signing ceremony, the Rutabaga asks a woman across the room, “How old are you?” when the White House cut the audio and blasted “God Bless America” to drown him out.
-Realize, to have that ready to go, the staff anticipates that the Rutabaga is going to act, well, . . . demented.
8) Minority leader Kevin McCarthy says we can fix the U.S. next year if we fire Botoxic.
-But not with you in charge, Kev.
9) Another anti-Trumper bites the dust. Massachusetts Governor Charlie Baker will not seek reelection.
10) Many remember the Afghan airstrike that killed civilians, but remember the Syrian airstrike that killed multiple civilians? The Pentagon launched a new investigation.
-I’m sure that will expose those who screwed up.
11) Speaking of whitewashes, the “fine people” at the FBI claimed the fascist so-called Antifa shooter in Dayton, Ohio, Connor Betts, didn’t belong to “any specific ideological group.”
-Betts praised a Portland Antifa terrorist who committed arson and endorsed left-wing political violence on his social media pages . . . but Nah, no group.
12) New Hampshire Senator Jean Shaheen predicts violence if the Supreme Court overturns Roe v. Wade. I wonder if the “fine people” at the FBI are investigating her for “incitement?”
13) Patriot Day defendant who testified against Capitol Police officer for communicating with him on Facebook is given plea deal.
-“Parading.” Yep. So far, the vast majority of these “insurrectionists” have been guilty of “parading.”
14) Mark Meadows, former Trump Chief of Staff, cooperating with Patriot Day committee.
-He should have no part in Trump’s second administration.
15) DARPA-funded research creates xenobots, the first AI-designed self-replicating living robots.
-What could go wrong?
16) Man who bought a Lamborghini with his $1.6 million PPP loan is sentenced to nine years in prison.
-He probably should have bought a Ferrari.
17) Wisconsin Supreme Court hands GOP a victory in a key ruling on new congressional maps.
18) Don’t agree with this: Trump calls for National Guard to help stop “smash-and-grab” looting.
-This is the excuse the Demented Pervert wants to militarize our cities and shut down all dissent.
19) Clueless Mike Pence (“Tuppence”) and his group are set to launch an $800 million campaign to support Joe Manchin over his position on social spending.
-Manchin-on-a-Hill will run to the right as long, and as far as he can, before voting for the bill. The money is wasted.
20) Keystone XL Pipeline owners seek $15 billion compensation for Biteme’s cancellation of the project.
21) More than 1,000 people murdered in Cook Co., Illinois this year, the most since 1994.
22) Amid crime wave in Franklin County, Ohio, the prosecutor says he’s protecting Ohioans of color . . . from the police.
IN INTERNATIONAL NEWS
23) The Chicoms are looking to mercenaries to protect Chinese interests abroad. Yah, those always work.
24) Well, this is reassuring: Russkie tanks massing on Ukraine border sport modifications against drones, Javelin anti-tank missiles.
-Thanks for tipping us off, Pootie-poot.
IN CHINA VIRUS NEWS
25) In major defeat for Biteme’s vax tyranny, a federal court (now the fourth to do so) issues a ruling against the vax mandate—but this is a national injunction, the first issued.
26) And another vax defeat: the three major U.S. automakers will not mandate vaxxes for UAW members.
27) Los Angeles Sheriff withdraws from county’s testing program citing ties of the testing units to the Chicoms.
28) Yet another scientific study shows China Virus “breakthrough” infections among the vaxxed are more common and severe among people whose immune systems are compromised.
29) Over 7,000 Marines unvaxxed as deadline hits.
30) Healthcare worker protests: Post-Mandate Psych-outs.
31) Biteme considers forcing all travelers returning to the U.S. to quarantine for seven days. May fine people who disregard.
32) Actress Monique Morely claims she had a heart attack after receiving the Pfizer vax.
33) And finally, Chris Christie’s book bombs, selling only 2,289 copies. For reference, in 2010 our publisher was shipping 19,000 copies of Patriot’s History of the United States in a single day!